Ex Marks The Spot

On the precipice…

Jumping into love is like standing on the precipice of a cliff edge, one that will undoubtedly take your life. You can dive in, fully claim love as something you are worthy of, or run. Sometimes the person you love, and who loves you, is the one to run, this is a devastating experience, one that leaves you staring up from the ocean as they walk back and retreat from the edge you just dived off without pausing to question or doubt. And their doubt breaks both your hearts, their cage becomes your own in the moment they decide to reject this love for the both of you…

It can be hard to breathe, like the life you both just stood on the edge of sharing has died with their exit, with their cowardice, with their shame! They knew what they were doing, never doubt it, because you turn them into a victim when you do. They CHOSE to leave you, to walk towards another life that would be easier because it let them hide, it enabled their negative patterns to continue without interruption. You see, love burns at all impure, it transforms and awakens; yet it also accepts that which is worth holding onto as a part of yourself, even where you perhaps think it a part that is unlovable, in that case, love will prove otherwise.

Love invited you both into its embrace, you hugged it back, whereas the person abandoning you to love yourself chose fear instead. Letting that be alright may take years, it might become the reason you can channel love and light into a song, a poem, or a work of art, letting love become your destiny without them will surely challenge you like no other experience. But when you are done, when all is finished and the pain has dissipated and you find yourself feeling safe, lovable, cherished and treasured by the divine, when you see that their rejection of the love was never about your deservedness, but their own inability to commit to the light and a potential shared destiny, you can love someone new… someone who never runs, only leans in when you do too.